Wednesday, October 14, 2009

Dating is a Part-Time Job

It’s not a surprise that there are many single people in their late 30s and over. Dating is exhausting. You have to put your best foot forward and with life’s daily responsibilities this really takes effort. It takes time to get to know someone, time for a spark to grow and who has that time anymore? When I do get free time there is a list of friends that I don't get to see often enough that could trump a meeting with someone new that hasn't ignited a spark quite yet.


At this point people my age are most likely settled with their jobs, friends, sometimes kids, home ownership, etc. It’s like an additional part-time job to date and look for a partner. Once a single woman even older than I said to me “well, don’t wait too long to settle down or you’ll end up alone.” I mean, it really is a choice right? I guess if I really chose to just be with someone I could have been with the last loser that liked me. Does that mean I’m not putting in the effort needed to find the kind of person and/or relationship I want?


Feels to me like I’ve put in the effort. I’ve made my list of desired traits in a mate, I’ve done the damn affirmations, I online date, I attend singles events, I tell friends I want to be set up, I’ve put myself out there in many ways. Is it that the men are not willing to put in the effort? Sure seems like the ones I meet aren’t. Am I looking in the wrong places? Is it really a matter of timing and fate? Who knows? For me, I just try to live in the moment and be thankful for the joy that is in my life already. Because if life really turns out the way you choose, then I am single by choice.

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